Archive for January, 2008

Being married menas you learn all kinds of new things…

9 Words Women Use

1. Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

2. Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

3. Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

4. Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don’t Do It!

5. Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)

6. That’s Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That’s okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

7. Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or Faint. Just say you’re welcome.

8 . Whatever: Is a women’s way of saying ‘Go To Hell’!!

9. Don’t worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking ‘What’s wrong?’ For the woman’s response refer to #3.

Not the same man…

No man ever steps in the same river twice,
for it’s not the same river and he’s not the same man.

Greek Philosopher
I have been re-reading some of my past posts in the blog, specifically from the time right before and after my surgery and it is alarming the change in tone from a few months before to the ensuing days and weeks. Although there are significantly less postings the language is acerbic and pointed, the attitude towards almost everything is tainted with a hue of distaste and distain. I mean I understand why, and even now I carry my resentment towards my failing body like a large stick with which I regularly beat life into submission. I was reading back since in the last 2 weeks I have had no less than 6 doctor’s appointments ranging from acupuncture to splint making for my mysterious carpal tunnel syndrome to a visit to the neurologist who thinks I have radial or brachial neuropathy. I was at the acupuncturist today getting more needles and electricity stuck into my back and then on to the Occupational Therapy department where I got sleeping splints made for me that are supposed to help with my carpal tunnel. I do not have any wrist pain, however according to the results of the nerve stimulation exercises that the neurologist did, I have an acute problem. So now I have these big plastic wrist protectors that I am supposed to wear in bed. Knowing how much I twitch while I am asleep and knowing that only inches away is my sleeping wife I can’t imagine these are going to get a lot of wear…
Yesterday’s acupuncture was not as spectacular as last week, however i was also not in any pain when I got there this time. We had coaching and tried to start floor routines however since hardly any of them could remember their routines it proved difficult. I now have to provide Karren with their floor routines, beam and bar routines for her to check over for competition which means I have to get my ass in gear and get them their videos of last year’s routines.