The Unexamined Life Is Not Worth Living – Socrates
Restaurant Reviews
Niagara Weekend Summer 2011
Aug 3rd
The Keg – Niagara Falls, Ontario
Spot the lobster...
It’s lobster summer which usually means an attempt to cover their insanely overpriced meals by adding lobster and giving them fancy names. However, nothing, even lobster, is going to soothe the sting of paying $45 for a plate of middle of the road restaurant food. The restaurant was packed, but we were seated quickly and our waitress was very attentive, friendly and happy to get 50% of our order right. Actually to be fair, she did put in the order correctly we can only assume that the kitchen messed up the thing. 2 of our 4 dinners were correct, but Nicole got a salad with no dressing (although she had asked for balsamic dressing which THEY DON’T HAVE!) and another of our party got a baked potato with her sides nowhere to be found. The problem wasn’t only with the order being wrong, but also with the fact it took 10 minutes to get put right. As I rightly predicted, the manager apologized and offered to pay for desserts for the whole table which we gladly accepted. As far as the food goes, I had ordered the scallops wrapped in bacon followed by the steak topped with lobster seafood mix. Both dishes were acceptable, there was a total of 2 tiny claws of lobster on my lobster dish which was a total rip off but all in all the taste was good.
For dessert I had the cheesecake but in retrospect I wish I’d had the creme brulee. I don’t know about you, but for me the Keg gives me the same feeling every time, the food is good, just good enough that you don’t wan’t to complain about the price but once you leave you realize you just got ripped off. I’m not saying the quality is bad, it’s not, but the prices are all about 20% too high.
Whirlpool Jet Boat Tours Niagara Falls Ontario
This was an amazing outing. About 45 mintues of the best laughs and thrills you can get while getting completely drenched in river water. Make sure that you plan on a warm day because even with the water being 80 degrees it was still chilly for some. The boat is a massive 3 engined 1500 HP beast that can do 360 degree turns and run level 5 rapids like they are nothing. We learned a bit about the area, the falls and the rapids themselves but the highlight is running downstream through the rapids as the boat scoops thousands of gallons of water over you. It was a great adventure, something I would recommend to anyone going to Niagara. It’ s only $60 per person so it’ s well worth the price, just remember a change of clothes!
Copacabana Brazilian Steak House Niagara Falls Ontario (Website down)
There are plenty of bad reviews for this place but we decided to go anyway since the lure of the place is too strong for a meat freak like me. The only real complaint I had is that the idiot woman who seated us complained that we couldn’t have the table instead of the booth since “everything” was reserved. Obviously she was not thrilled to have to work, didn’t care about us or the way she treated us and was basically your typical asshole twenty something stick insect who thinks the world owes her something because she thinks she is hot. Anyway, the place was pretty fun, loud and filled with good looking waiters and waitresses obviously catering to a younger crowd. The process is that you get some sides from the buffet area and wait for the meat guys to come around and cut meat off their giant skewers onto your plate. There are 17 different kinds of meat on offer and I think we tried them all. As long as you don’t expect a quiet restaurant to chat with friends and you don’t mind a fast paced and energetic vibe you should enjoy yourself here. The meat itself was, for the most part, very good. They have encrusted meats, cheese stuffed meats and good quality steaks on offer. The meat was, I have to admit, salty but not to the degree that it was offputting. The cheese stuffed prime rib was fantastic and I had at least 3 servings of bacon wrapped sirloin! I would definitely recommend that you go at least once, it’s very much like being on vacation in a tropical island, it’s loud, the wait staff are sometimes forgetful but always happy and the place itself is like a tiny getaway. I think we would try the one in Toronto to compare experiences but next time I will have to remember to 24 hour fast before hand. It did take me 2 days to get over the amount I ate, but that is a sign that we all had a great time!
Doubletree Hilton Niagara Falls Ontario
We have stayed here before and obviously since we returned we liked it enough! The room this time was a little bizarre and since we had 4 of us in one room utilizing the pull out couch for 2 of us it was a great experience. For the other 2 however, they were sleeping on a pullout that was barely a double and filled the extra room completely. There was only a single bathroom for all of us and the main room had fixed curtains that blocked the corner windows which I found bizarre. Last time was better, I have to admit, but this time was cheaper overall. I think for the future though it would be worth getting separate rooms. We had breakfast in the hotel on Sunday and once again the buffet was well stocked, had an omelette maker at their own station and the food was good quality, hot and well prepared.
July 1 2011, the camping weekend and updates
Jul 5th
P’kah seems to be the only word that really means anything to Elyse. Well, that and abdiggy abdiggy which seems to be an expression of delight. Spending time with Marianna and Violet this weekend has shown that kids develop so differently, even being so close in age. Their temperaments are already coming out and of course with that the parents’ associated predictions of their future personalities. The weekend was very enjoyable despite the drive, I was dreading the drive home the whole time we were there but luckily for us I think leaving at 10:30 got us about 30 minutes ahead of the big slowdown.
We left on Friday morning at some ungodly hour (7:30 I think) because it was July 1 and we had the day off for Canada Day. The early start meant that Elyse wasn’t going to sleep right off the bat but she was pretty well behaved until after she had her first nap on the far side of Barrie. As we got onto the 400 there was already a huge line of traffic, fortunately there had been a problem which had cleared and by Canal Road we were free and clear. Even going through Barrie there was no slowdown. Once we got to Huntsville we decided to go and see if Isabel was working at the Farmer’s Daughter however unfortunately we missed her by just a few minutes. We had coffee, let Elyse stretch her little legs and got back on the road knowing that as far as we were, we were less than half way.
The drive up to North Bay was not bad, mostly for the fact I had never been up there before (why would I??) and the scenery was pretty. The traffic had tailed off to nothing until we rolled into and through North Bay coming out the far side into what is the small town of Sturgeon Falls. On the way up Nicole had found that there was a culinary battle of chip trucks going on in Sturgeon Falls between Larry’s and The Riv both located on the same small street directly opposite one another. As we cruised through town we noticed that the traffic lights were out and once we were out of the car we were informed that the power to the whole town was out. That unfortunately meant that Larry’s couldn’t cut chips so we went across to the Riv and had poutine and a pogo, both standards and the flagship items of both stores. The poutine was amazing, beefy, cheesy and the gravy and curds were all the way through the box of fries not just poured on top like most places do.
After our fill, we took the side road down to Glenrock camp ground and were greeted by what I can only describe as a gypsy site, children running around barefoot, tents and makeshift caravans parked with apparent abandon everywhere, dogs on the loose and people sitting out on their garden chairs surveying their neighbours. It was a rather disturbing site to be honest. We had a hard time finding our “cabin” or shack as I think it deserves to be called but once inside I was pleasantly surprised to find flushing toilets, hot water and electricity. Elyse immediately set about investigating the cabin as we unpacked the car and filled the fridge. I was wiped after the drive so I opted for a short nap, waking in time to be joined by the other couples and their two daughters.
The space was cramped, there is no escaping that, but since we had planned to spend most of the time outdoors, it really didn’t matter that much. We set up the chairs outside and let the girls loose to go and play in the grass and the kids playground outside our back door. They were good to each other, but as kids do they eventually upset each other, stole toys from each other and made up by feeding floorios to each other, it was really very cute! The rest of the day was spent at the shack, hanging out and doing very little. I did manage to get my kettlebell workout done much to the amusement and interest of the surrounding campers. As the evening rolled in we fired up the BBQ and got to work making dinner and getting the kids ready for bed. I was very surprised that the girls were able to sleep through each other’s crying and didn’t seem to mind the change in their bed locations from home. The site was pretty noisy but the kids slept well in any case. Because it was Canada Day, there was a small but occasionally noisy fireworks display which was in reality was more like some guy letting off a box of costco fireworks over the lake. We participated with sparklers and spent the rest of the night making s’mores, fire grilled hot dogs and debating the possibility of pulling a sparkler out of the fire with your butt cheeks. Needless to say, it was a regular campers night.
The rest of the weekend passed quickly, one of the couples left to spend time with family on Saturday leaving the rest of us to play with the girls and hang out at the site. We did return for more poutine and pogos with Larry’s failing to impress as much as The Riv did. I did manage to get another workout done since the fries were going to sit in my stomach all night if I didn’t. The evening was another BBQ, another fire and a Bingo night provided by the camp site. One of our group won $40 which was a bonus while her husband and I spent our time ridiculing the game the same way you would make fun of someone saying shuffleboard is a sport. The weekly dance was on Saturday night and provided hours of entertainment for us watching the pre-teens dancing in the bandstand, doing cartwheels and handstands to bad 80’s soft rock. Nicole and I had already done our share of cartwheels and handstands but when Party Rockers came on we delighted our travelling companions with our snappy dance moves! Some scrabble, more music and a good cigar later and I retired feeling a little under the weather.
As delightful as the weekend was, I was concerned about the drive home being very long so we opted for a very early departure with coffees in hand trying to make it to Huntsville area before 1130 when I had projected people would start to leave. The timing was good, and the traffic was not all that bad although we spent at least 30 minutes in a jam where the 400 and 11 meet. One of the other couples was about an hour behind us and spent their whole afternoon in traffic. It was so bad, they stopped at McDonalds just to get out of the throng of vacationers. Nicole, Elyse and I made it home around 2pm and spent the majority of the rest of the day recovering from the drive. As I had imagined, Sunday was a complete bust.
Although I enjoyed the weekend the drive was completely unnecessary. There are places just as nice close to home but since one of the couples was visiting family, we went along for the trip. I wouldn’t get roped into going up there again. Whatever Sudbury has to offer, I don’t need it. I enjoyed the weekend, and even the drive back didn’t dampen my spirits too much, although timing was everything! Elyse made it through none the worse for wear and managed to experience her first camping trip, her first exposure to French Canadians and of course her first almost 10 hour car trip.
P’kah. P’kahhhhh indeed!
Surprise, it’s NYC!
Feb 23rd
So my wonderful wife surprised me with a trip to NYC for my birthday this past weekend so rather than sulk in the basement about my age and work out too hard, we ended up walking around NYC for the best part of 6 hours a day for 4 days. The weather was incredible 62 degrees which made it New York in the spring. Ever since we visited NY a couple of years ago we have wanted to go back, much the same as Chicago and Boston however since this was a surprise visit, I didn’t get much of a chance to plan the events. We did however manage to get to some amazing food places both on our NY Food on Foot tour and by ourselves. Of course, I was bound and determined to stay paleo and I think I did a pretty good job. 
Our first stop was to Hill Country BBQ (30 West 26th St) a place that I had found on a couple of Paleo sites as being one of the hot spots. The food was pretty good, I liked the whole setup with the card that you get checked for each thing you order. Also, they serve the food in brown paper which just added to the experience. The food on the whole was good, the brisket was tasty, but tougher than you would have thought. The chicken was apparently good, and since we ordered the lunch special we got to try several items for a pretty good price of around $25. The ribs were very good, both beef and pork, and the sauces available at the table were tasty and not overly hot or spicy. We would go back, that is for sure, however we found another place that we enjoyed even more. That place was Virgil’s BBQ and I have to say it kicked HC’s ass. The brisket was the best I have ever had, melt in your mouth, massive flavour and juicy as could be. The other meats we had were equally good including the chicken, ribs and the order of wings I had were the best smoked wings I have ever tasted. The smoke flavour is what made it so good, but you could also tell the quality of the meat was amazing. It was truly the best BBQ I have ever eaten and that is saying a lot considering last time we were here we went to Blue Smoke! So the Paleo lifestyle was truly in check, and I have never felt better. During the rest of our stay, we made a point of going to Whole Foods to stock up the apartment style hotel room at Eastgate Towers, but also, on the last day we went to Trader Joe’s to find out what the big deal was. Well, for a Canadian that doesn’t have a food outlet like Trader Joe I was in heaven. They had raw nuts and seeds, grass fed beef and plenty of snacks and meals for the Paleo eater. I was surprised to find that everything in the store was Trader Joe brand, I was not expecting that, but the pricing was pretty good and we left with a bunch of nuts and seeds with which to make my own brand of trail mix.
Shake Shack FTW!!
The Food on Foot tour took us along 9th Avenue in Hell’s Kitchen to 7 smaller and less expensive stores. The food quality all in all was pretty good and it was interesting to see the neighbourhood. For whatever reason Hell’s Kitchen has a lot of small inexpensive and quality restaurants. From Go Sushi to Amy’s Bread to City Sandwich we ate our way up and down 9th with abandon including a stop at The Little Pie Company. The tour was fun, the guide was a very pleasant guy and we met people from all over the world in the group.
What a great weekend, all in all, however, I did ZERO working out. I was not concerned, because this was supposed to be a rest week for me anyway and walking 6 hours a day is good enough. I did get mild shin splints and stretched my groin a little, but all in all, it was a great time away.
I would be remiss if I didn’t also mention a couple of other places. First, Shake Shack which has the most amazing, tasty, juicy and irresistible burgers ever with amazing crispy crinkle cut fries and shakes that are literally out of this world. The place was packed and once we got our food we knew why. If you go to NYC, you MUST GO to Shake Shack. Also, for my wife, a shout out to rice to riches where she had some delicious 
rice pudding (who knew there was a store dedicated to rice pudding??) and I enjoyed their decor, ambiance and the fact they didn’t hide the fact that they are selling a bowl of carbs that will make you fat! They also claim to have “Dozens of Delicious Flavours and 3 Shitty Ones”!
Other food highlights include Pop Burger near FAO Schwartz, Poseidon Bakery on 9th which had amazing nut brittle and Levain’s Bakery which was featured on Best Thing I Ever Ate and who had very tasty cookies according to my wife who enjoyed it so much by the time we got across the street the melty chocolate was all over her face!
So back to reality, I will do day 1 of my new program today, skip the day off and complete the week.
June – Birth Month
Jun 1st
So here we are, it’s time for the baby to come. At the very least we can say that it will be this month! We have a lot of people who for some weird reason want us to force the baby out now. I am not sure if this is just a human nature thing but what happened to nature taking it’s course. Being our baby, I am sure she will be right on schedule, ready to go just like her on-time and organized parents.
We spent last night admiring the ENORMOUS deck that is taking shape in the back yard and putting together a vibrating baby chair. It seems that these baby items are as much a challenge to fathers as they are entertainment to the babies. Either way, once she does arrive she will have everything she needs which is probably about 3 times what we will actually use!
So it is June, time for me to stop whining about my lack of exercise and start back in with P90X and Insanity. I have rested long enough, my back is fine and I am starting to feel slovenly which usually happens when I get a little squidgy around the edges. I was scoping out the deck last night trying to imagine a place for the chinup bar and an area to hang some tools to get them out of the garage. Once the upper deck is done I can start designing and building the lower deck however I think it may take longer than I anticipate. Seeing what the upper deck has gone through being built I am pretty sure that so far I have underestimated the complexity of the project. However, I will have 3 weeks off to do it so I am sure I will manage.
The official announcement for the England World Cup team is happening today, and I find it coincidental that our daughter is scheduled to be born on day 1 of the World Cup. Maybe it is a sign that it is England’s year?! Maybe we should call her Fifa!
Speaking of names, we still haven’t decided however the more people we speak to, the more we find people who decided and then changed their mind at the last minute. Plenty of the kids at gym have names that are completely different that the names their parents had picked, even those who had been calling the belly the name they wanted… I wonder what makes people change their minds so drastically once the baby arrives.
Since Nicole has been off work (both days now) I have neglected to make my lunch, so today we are going to a cheap and (apparently) tasty sushi Restaurant for take out. It’s called Sam Jung Japanese Restaurant and I will let you know how it is. It is very weird not having Nicole here, every time I walk past her desk I do a double take seeing Amy there. It’s a consolation knowing that we will have 3 weeks together at home pretty soon but still, work sucks without her.
*Sam Jung was good, very quick, extremely good quality and pretty good price. I will definitely go again!
2nd Anniversary Weekend – Hilton Hotel and Suites Niagara
Aug 24th
It is weird to read what someone else’s experience is about an event that you share. It really depends on what you contribute to it and how that colours how you enjoy it. For example, according to Nicole I seem to have napped most of the time this past weekend and her overriding memory seems to be of the casino. For me, the poor sod who has to drive the car, the experience is completely different. Mostly I like driving, but when it comes to having to drive in torrential downpours and endless traffic jams my enjoyment is diminished significantly. My overriding memory of the weekend then is not the casino, which was a lot of fun, especially since I didn’t really lose any money. It is not the room, which was amazing, a pass through window to the bedroom from the jacuzzi bathroom and a view of the falls and the Casino. It is not our discovery of a brand new shopping and restaurant area in Amherst (I guess this would be like driving from Etobicoke into Mississauga and discovering all the different stores there) including the same ring store where we can now take Nicole’s engagement ring to get cleaned. It is not even the enormous pile of nachos that I had at the British Pub style restaurant at the casino as outlined below:
Their description:
After a busy day in Niagara, come meet friends or simply relax in the warm and inviting pub atmosphere of The Falls & Firkin. Enjoy a wide selection of domestic and imported draught beer, as well as wines and cocktails, while you seek refuge in a variety of comfortable seating overlooking the Falls. Their extensive menu includes traditional pub fare and delicious daily specials, covering lunch, dinner, late-night snacks and weekend brunch.
My description:
After a busy day in the Casino losing all your money and getting bumped from your machine by grumpy senior citizens with menace in their eyes even though you only stood up to stretch your legs, come and relax in the comfortable but oddly low booth seating in the Falls & Firkin. Enjoy watching us eject unruly Asian people as they attempt to eat their own food on our patio and marvel at the inappropriately tight Lululemon pants on our (obviously oblivious) slightly portly waitress. Enjoy a wide selection of food as long as it is fish and chips, nachos or beans and mash since our understanding of British Pub cuisine obviously comes from The Simpsons or Family Guy. You can have a myriad of different beers but in order to do so you have to catch the waiter with the weird hair or try and track down the bartender who is occupied chatting up some pierced face weirdo who looks more like a pincushion than a fashion statement. But take our advice, have the nachos, it will make all the rest of the experience go away.
My overriding memory of the weekend then was none of the above, and no, it was not even the traffic. My overrriding memory of the weekend was how amazing it was to me (if not to her) that Nicole was able to read tiny street signs, to see wonderful cloud formations and to see the beauty of the falls from our room without her glasses or contacts. It took me right back to when I had my eyes done and the marvel it was finally to be without contact lenses for the first time in 20 years. I know exactly how she feels, something which for men and women is rare. I even know how she will feel as the days and weeks pass which is even more strange. But most of all I know that she is happy which to me is the best Anniversary present of all.
The Hilton Hotel and Suites was nice, well appointed, comfortable and clean. The service was good, although we did not use any of the amenities. I would recommend the hotel but only of you can get a good deal on a room. There is no way I would pay $250 a night for it, but then again, there are very few places I would pay that kind of money for. The place is well built, pleasant to walk through which is nice, the lobby area is large and welcoming and the halls to the rooms are equally appealing and clean. The room itself as noted was very nice and interestingly laid out. However, the shower door seal leaked and the door did not close properly meaning that after I had finished showering the floor of the bathroom was completely flooded, not only a pain for me to mop up, but also extremely dangerous. The shower door has a full width handle on the outside but a very small and difficult to grip cylindrical knob on the inside. This makes it impossible to pull the door hard enough to close it should it not have been built properly, which our obviously had not. The windows were a decent size however I think that a flagship hotel overlooking one of the Wonders of the World could have full length windows or at least full width… Anyway, my enjoyment of the hotel was not diminished by these items. There was an amusing item as we walked from the parking lot to the hotel. Each floor has a “Hotel Events” large screen monitor encased in an expensive looking wooden display on which the hotel displays any conference information, helpful visitor tips and so on. The one on our floor however indicated that today’s Hotel Event was that “There are unused items on your desktop”. Maybe someone should call the helpdesk?
I am not sure if we reviewed the casino last time but the review is short and sweet. If you try hard you could imagine you are in Vegas. The casino itself is very nice, large and bright and well ventilated. It is not quite as loud as some of the Vegas casinos and certainly not as large but it is about as close as you will find anywhere around here. The machines play differently, there is no doubt that the payouts are less and that the variety is not comparable however it really doesn’t affect your enjoyment of the place. You can winn enough to keep playing which is the key and if you are very lucky like my wife (in more ways that one!) you can win enough to go shopping in Buffalo. One thing I did notice is that the Players Club works differently than in Vegas. They only bank points for the money that you put into the machine not for the time that you play. In Vegas you can put in $20 and play for an hour racking up credits enough to get you a free buffet in no time. At Niagara, unless you are putting cash into the machine you don’t get credits. Playing isn’t enough in other words, you have to pay! Their system calls for 100 points to get $10 play cash. However it notes that you have to put in between $40 and $60 to get ONE POINT!!! Enough said. Basically if you can’t get to Vegas and you want the next best thing go to Atlantic City. If you can’t leave the country then go to Niagara Fallsview. Just check the weather and the traffic before you go!